Safety Plan: National Alert

A Survivor of domestic violence contacted me today and asked that I remind other victims who may still be living at home with the person who is abusive to them to remain aware. 

*Julie wanted to remind me that her partner would discover things that she was using to help her keep safe and immediately assume that some other man was involved. The hidden money her sister sent even the extra quarters to use the pay phone just in case she had to escape into the night and make a life-saving phone call. 

Julie said that when she heard today’s alarm, her thoughts were with victims who have not yet been able to make it out.  What about those who have hidden cell phones and simply forgot or neglected to make sure that an alert did not go off.

“Please make sure to remind others to check to see if someone has already clicked on the “ok” notification.” 

Julie wanted also to remind friends and family of people that they may be concerned are in a violent relationship to check on those loved ones. Make sure that they know that you are there for them.

Over and over Julie told me that she did not want to “sound crazy”. I assured her that she did not sound crazy.  She has survived a very real experience that too many others are living through daily. And one that many have not lived through.

Thank you Julie.

Did your cell phone make a screeching noise today? Here’s why

Remember:

• If there is an argument, try to keep or move it away from weapon-heavy areas like the kitchen or bathroom.  
• Keep a phone nearby and at least have a couple of numbers pre-dialed for 911. Or even 911 so that all that you have to do is press send. If you get an operator, you don’t have to speak in full sentences. 
• Yell phrases.  

“Hurting me”

“fire”

“need police”

“has a weapon”

and your address.

• If you believe that there could be an argument or tension, back the car in. You want to be able to jump in and pull off immediately.
• Be aware that there could be a tracker on your car, your phone, in the child’s car seat without your knowledge.  Avoid getting somewhere and believing that you are “safe” because you do not see your partner.  Check and double-check for tracking devices. If you feel safe doing so, just drive to a police station. 
• Teach children a safety plan.  Which neighbor should they run to?  Where can they go? Who should they call in an emergency?  

Your safety plan might change often. Keep mentally reviewing it. (I do not recommend writing it down.)  You can call crisis hotlines to update yours and keep coming up with new strategies. 

Getting Harder for Women Today: Know Your Manipulators