They’ve never met. Different backgrounds.Different languages.Different cultures.Different religions.Some in suits, some in uniforms, some behind pulp
They’ve never met.
Different backgrounds.
Different languages.
Different cultures.
Different religions.
Some in suits, some in uniforms, some behind pulpits, others behind closed doors.
Yet, without a single meeting, conference call, or secret group chat…
They agree.
Abusers—those who harm, silence, and violate—seem to always know the terms and conditions.
They agree that women should be quiet, even when we’re bleeding.
They agree that girls must “watch how they dress,” because somehow fabric is more powerful than force.
They agree that the way to judge a woman is by her skirt—but never a man by his violence.
They agree that “boys will be boys” while girls are taught to be careful, to be polite, to be still.
They agree to ignore patterns.
To overlook histories.
To dismiss survivors.
To preserve the illusion, not protect the innocent.
They agree that silence is sacred—not the kind that heals, but the kind that hides.
They agree that a woman speaking truth is dangerous, disruptive, and inconvenient.
They agree that men’s feelings must come before women’s safety.
They don’t need a secret handshake.
They don’t need to share a language.
They just need a shared ego.
A shared fear of losing control.
A shared desire to be accepted, to stay comfortable, to go along to get along.
They agree—while pretending not to.
But we see the pattern.
And here’s what else is true:
We don’t need their permission to call it what it is.
We don’t need their approval to break the silence.
We don’t need to be palatable to be powerful.
Let them agree in the dark.
We’ll organize in the light.
We are survivors.
We are truth-tellers.
And we are not confused.
Not anymore.
Abusers don’t require secret meetings, emails, or conference calls to coordinate their harmful beliefs. They don’t need to know one another personally or agree explicitly. Yet, they always seem united in their terms and conditions:
- They unanimously agree women have no inherent right to bodily safety or autonomy.
- They collectively endorse the myth that a woman’s clothing can justify assault. There’s a “uniform” for victims, yet men’s attire never raises suspicion or blame.
- They collectively decide to dismiss clear, repeating patterns of abuse, acting as if each incident is isolated, trivial, or misunderstood.
- They uphold silence as sacred, treating anyone who breaks it—anyone who speaks truth—as if they’re committing a cardinal sin.
- Above all, they agree men’s feelings, comfort, and reputation outweigh women’s safety, truth, and justice.
They align seamlessly through shared ego, fear of rejection, and the desire to blend into mainstream acceptance. Their silence and complicity is a deafening agreement.
But Survivors, we hear the whispers clearly. We see the patterns vividly.
Survivors, it’s time we unite even more strongly than they do. Let’s amplify our truths louder than their silence. Let’s prioritize our safety and dignity higher than their comfort.
Together, let’s redefine the terms and conditions for our own healing, justice, and peace.
