Quick Tips for When You’re Tired of Pretending You’re Okay

(For When You Can’t Fall Apart, But Can’t Keep Faking Either)

🎧 1. Use a “Voice Dump” App

📱 What to do: Open your voice recorder and just talk. No intro. No edits. No audience.

• Say everything you’re holding in.

• Don’t worry about coherence.

• When you’re done, name the file something soft like “Storm, passed.”
  This creates a release without performance or vulnerability exposure.

✍🏾 2. Write the Response You Wish You Could Say

🖊️ What to do: The next time someone asks “How are you?”—pause.
Even if you fake the answer out loud, write down the real one afterward.

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• Keep a notepad or app called “My True Answers.”

• Example: “Today, I feel like I’m holding up the sky and no one’s noticed.”

🧍🏽‍♀️ 3. Find a No-Talk Space

🧘🏾 What to do: Go to a place where no one expects anything from you.

• This might be a church with weekday quiet hours, a public library, a park bench facing away from foot traffic.

• Let your body exhale. No mask, no role, no story.

• This is your “nothing required” zone.

🪞 4. Talk to the Mirror—With Warmth

What to do: Look yourself in the eyes and say,
“You don’t have to be okay today. You’re still good.”

• This may feel awkward—but over time, it softens the harsh voice in your head.

• You’re reminding your nervous system: I see you.

🕯️ 5. Pick One Truth to Honor

What to do: Name one truth you won’t hide today.

• Maybe it’s, “I’m not going to smile if I don’t feel like it.”

• Or, “I’m allowed to be tired without apologizing.”

• Choose it in the morning. Repeat it once before bed.

That’s emotional integrity. Even in small doses.

🧡 6. Create a ‘Permission Ritual’

What to do: Light a candle. Play one song. Sit for five minutes.

Say aloud:

“I release the need to pretend. I honor my whole self. I am safe with me.”

This is the start of undoing years of self-betrayal. Five minutes may be enough.