Sometimes the Lessons From Your Lived Experiences Intimidate Others

This “teacher braiding” conversation speaks to a much larger issue. 

The inability to hv conversations 

around ‘boundaries’ without 

gutter-low accusations of 

‘trauma projection’ being slung around.

A video of a Black male teacher went viral. The teacher, whose hair was in braids/twists, was seated as several of his young female students unbraided his hair.  

For those unfamiliar with Black hair, unbraiding can be a tedious process.  Young girls have “take down” parties where the girls collectively unbraid one another’s hair. 

While some people on social media made critiques around ‘professionalism’, ‘appropriateness’ and ‘boundaries’…..people responded by slinging allegations.  

“Trauma projection”

“Taking down a man”

“Taking down a Black man”

It is *ALWAYS* a lifetime battle to protect girls because basic ‘boundaries’ are interpreted as:

• ‘unhealed trauma’
• ‘Overprotection’
• ‘Bitterness’
• ‘Hate 4 males’

…and that starts with the women. 

Note how other women, who do not know this teacher personally, attack other women (“trauma projection” & “You need therapy”) for the “crime of asserting that girls are entitled to boundaries. 

Too often, it is other women who put in the hard labor to actively dismantle much-needed safeguards for women and girls. 

Such allegations often keep people from constructing safe boundaries around the vulnerable. They reinforce the silence. 

Because they are a potential risk to the dignity and safety of others, we gotta stop being so nice to these folks by the way. 

 Never allow others to silence your voice or efforts.  

Never apologize for the lessons you have learned or the wisdom that you have gained; even through pain.

 ESPECIALLY through pain. 

Yes. Intentionally healing can make you more empathetic and compassionate. It can make you appreciate the little things in life. It can help you to see life experiences in a brighter light. 

Yes. All life lessons count. Not just those we learn under the safest and most ideal circumstances. 

Yes. Every lesson that you have learned is a part of you.

So, yes.….Be full strength.  Live full strength.

Be powerful. Live powerfully.

Unapologetically. 

No matter who it intimidates. 

Awareness of these tactics is more than half the battle. 

@dkvrii #stitch with @JaQ Lee #classroom #teachersoftiktok #teachersbelike #teachersontiktok #knotlessbraids #braids #goddessbraids #millennial #millennialsoftiktok #genz #fyp #fypdong ♬ Chopin Nocturne No.2 Op.9-2(1391533) – 314P

Another Male Professional Response

And…we told you that older women are not the only defenders of males when they are careless with boundaries and respect….looking at the younger women who took this debate to unnecessary levels over a man they don’t know.