.png "For Women and Children, Indefinitely Going Along to Get Along is One of the Most Dangerous Strategies in the World")
For Women and Children, Indefinitely Going Along to Get Along is One of the Most Dangerous Strategies in the World
Many of us have had to "go along to get along" for a little while,but pushing for it indefinitely and just "hoping for safety"is d [...]
Red Flags: Why Am I Feeling Unseen Here? Clues Survivors Notice First.
To be clear: People are not going to always feel seen. This is a huge planet. We are specifically talking about spaces, and conversations around viole [...]
A Society That Centers Harmful Males Will Never Have Trust—And It Doesn’t Deserve It
Trust is not a gift.Trust is built.Earned.Sustained through action, protection, and accountability.
But what happens when a society builds its laws [...]
✋🏽 When Accountability Feels Like an Attack to Him
[WeSurviveAbuse.com]
Some men don’t fear the harm they cause.They fear the moment a woman finally says,“You will not harm me anymore.”
This is perpe [...]
If the Harm Is Precise, Our Words Must Be Precise
I see you. You see me. We see one another.
There are groups who are targeted because of who they are — yet the moment they try to name that truth, pe [...]
Sex-Based Social Control Is Not About Beauty. It’s About Access to Humanity.
Let’s talk about one of the most sinister tactics in the game:Sex-Based Social Control.
On the surface, it may look like beauty standards, pr [...]
“I Told Her” Is About You—Not the Victim
Let’s talk about it.
When a woman is harmed—physically, emotionally, spiritually—one of the most common things we hear is: “I told her.”“I war [...]
There Is No Bad Day to Tell the Truth
To every Survivor who has ever hesitated, second-guessed, or swallowed the truth to protect someone else's comfort:You are not late.You are not wrong. [...]
Explain Like I'm 5: What victims of domestic violence go through to get justice
I originally posted this on 9/3/15. On 5/16/2016 I aided a victim in DC and unfortunately this is still true. Why doesn't she leave? This [...]
Coercion in Disguise: When Love Asks You to Lie
When someone pressures a woman to lie, to go against her beliefs, her conscience, her values, her faith, or her integrity—that is not love. That is [...]
Lucy Diggs Slowe: She Protected Us in Silence So We Could One Day Speak
“Because boundaried spaces don’t build themselves—someone has to brave the silence first.”[WeSurviveAbuse.com]
Most people will tell you Lucy [...]
How Society Continues to Enable Abuse and Violation of Women and Girls in Sports
Article roundup HERE elink.io | See Original [...]
He Harmed Who He Harmed — Not Who He Told the World He Wanted
People keep acting like a man’s sexual identity is a character reference.
They say things like:
“He likes women.”“He has a girlfriend. [...]
🎯Weaponized Hypotheticals Are Not Harmless — They’re Punishment for a Woman’s Freedom
updated from June 9 2025
Weaponized HypotheticalsDefinition: When people—often men—create imagined stories about a woman’s love life (“She probably [...]
Don’t Look Away: How Polite Fiction Becomes a Predator’s Shield
There is language that has been troubling my soul. As a Womanist historian, I know that misinformation is not just an error; it is a weapon use [...]
Weaponized Moralism: The Silence That Screams
They call it compassion.But only when it protects male access.
They call it justice.But only when women are asked to surrender boundaries.
They call [...]
You’re Not Asking for Perfection—You’re Asking for Respect: Recognizing a Common Deflection Tactic
🎭 The Tactic
When you call out something harmful—like antisemitism, racism, sexism, or rape apologia—and the person responds with: “So I guess y [...]
30 Red Flags of Unsafe People: How to Spot Them Early
Some people are simply unsafe. Whether in personal relationships, workplaces, social settings, movements, politics, or online spaces, unsafe individ [...]
You Call It Staying. She Calls It Surviving.
You look at her and ask, “Why did she stay?”
But you don’t know the whole story.
You saw a snapshot.She’s been living the full movie.
To you, it [...]
30 Signs of a Dangerous Person: How to Protect Yourself from Manipulators & Predators
Unsafe people don’t always reveal their true nature immediately. They test boundaries, manipulate emotions, and gain trust before showing their worst [...]
⚠️ Trigger Warning: Child Sexual Abuse, Victim-Blaming
Updated for 2025 Updated from 2016: I was watching one of my favorite shows—Greenleaf on OWN. If you’ve ever watched it, you know [...]
The Patriarchy’s Secret Weakness | Why Withdrawal Works (video by Therese)
"Misogyny doesnt show up as hate, it shows up as expectations" Patriarchy is not just a system of laws. It is a ghost we keep alive by feeding it. [...]
.png "Why Does Society Make it Difficult for Survivors of Rape & Abuse to Come Forward? Part 2")
Why Does Society Make it Difficult for Survivors of Rape & Abuse to Come Forward? Part 2
Original post 9/23/15 7. Every choice that you ever made (sexually) is scrutinized. They have questions.
Q: How many i [...]
If He Will Strangle You, He May Kill You
There are few acts more dangerous, more intimate, and more predictive of future lethal violence than this one:Strangulation.
Let’s stop minimizing [...]
💜 20 Ways to Support Celebrity Women Who Protect Themselves from Abuse
Before we cheer for progress, we must reckon with our past.Tina Turner was not just a legend—she was a Survivor.And yet, when she told the truth abo [...]
This Isn’t “Just Drama.” This Is Coercive Sex Trafficking
There is a deep and dangerous misunderstanding about the case involving Sean Combs and what it means to traffic someone through coercion. So let’s m [...]
✊🏾 Teaching Before the Harm: The Difference Between Comfort and Safety
“We learn too late because no one taught us soon enough.
Let this be the generation that teaches before the harm.”
Comfort feels nice.
Safety keeps [...]
The Pressure to “Be Nice” While Male Violence Goes Excused
If ever you have any question about which people in the room are women: It will be the ones in the room pushed to "be nice" or "be kind"
The [...]
Cultural Complicity: The Silence That Hurts More Than the First Harm
He Did the Harm. They Held the Door.
Sometimes it’s not just the person who hurts you.
It’s the people who stay quiet.
It’s the family who says,“Do [...]
Her VOICE is Terrifying But Not His Violence?
Some men (and women) don’t define harm as what they’ve done.They define harm as a woman’s refusal to keep quiet about it.
In this upside-down worldvi [...]
When Chaos Is a Weapon: How Some Partners Use Crisis to Control You
And why you’re not “mean” for wanting peace It starts with a bad decision. Maybe a DUI.Maybe losing another job.Maybe a fight with the [...]