By Tonya GJ Prince | WeSurviveAbuse.comSome people believe that stalking only happens after long, intense relationships. They think, "Oh, she mus
By Tonya GJ Prince | WeSurviveAbuse.com
Some people believe that stalking only happens after long, intense relationships.
They think, “Oh, she must’ve been with him for years.”
“Maybe he just couldn’t let go.”
“There must be a deeper story.”
But the truth is far more terrifying—and far more common.
It doesn’t take long.
Sometimes, just a couple of dates.
Sometimes, just a few messages exchanged.
Sometimes, just one conversation, one perceived rejection, one “no thanks.”
That’s all it takes for some individuals to become dangerously obsessed.
Real Talk: This Could Happen to Anyone
There have been heartbreaking cases of women—especially Black women—who dated someone for only a week or two, and ended up losing their lives.
Not because they were reckless.
Not because they missed “red flags.”
But because they were targeted by someone who felt entitled to their time, their body, their attention.
Someone who believed rejection was humiliation.
And humiliation deserved punishment.
Here’s What People Don’t Realize:
Stalking can begin at the very start of a relationship.
According to the National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey, over 50% of stalking victims are stalked by someone they dated or were in an intimate relationship with—even briefly.It doesn’t take a relationship to breed obsession.
Many stalkers begin their campaign after being turned down. One study found that over 25% of stalking cases began after a short-term encounter or even a single interaction.Black women are often blamed instead of protected.
We are judged more harshly, believed less often, and given fewer safety resources—especially when our relationships don’t fit a neat, sympathetic narrative.
It’s Not About Time. It’s About Control.
Control doesn’t need years to take root.
It just needs access.
Entitlement.
And a society that constantly asks women to prove we didn’t “lead someone on.”
This isn’t about whether she should have seen it coming.
This is about recognizing that violence doesn’t wait for a long-term relationship to get started.
If You’re Dating, You Deserve Protection—No Matter How Short the Relationship Was
You don’t owe anyone your time.
You don’t owe anyone your body.
You don’t have to stay just to be “polite” or “safe.”
And if someone refuses to take no for an answer,
that’s not passion—it’s a warning.
We say it again and again: Stalking is not love. It’s not romantic. It’s not a compliment.
It is violence.
It is control.
And sometimes—it’s fatal.
Please stop asking how long they were together.
Start asking:
Why are so many women punished for saying no?
[rosaschildren.com] | [wesurviveabuse.com] | [survivoraffirmations.com]
Share if you feel safe and ready—your voice might be the lifeline someone else needs. And if you do share, remember to cite the messenger. Words carry legacy.
