Too often, when the topic of prostitution or “sex work” comes up, the first question is: “Why did she choose that?”But I’ve been walking beside Surviv
Too often, when the topic of prostitution or “sex work” comes up, the first question is: “Why did she choose that?”
But I’ve been walking beside Survivors for over 30 years, and I’ll tell you this: that question is too small for a story this big.
What people call “choice” is too often a cover for the very real pain of children who were failed—long before they ever reached adolescence.
When you sit with the truth, not the headlines or hashtags, you learn to stop asking why she “chose it” and start asking who failed her.
And how many failed her—over and over again.
Let’s speak truth that sets us free. Here are 10 essential insights every safe adult needs to know:
🔍 1. The Average Entry Age Is Not What Most People Think
The average age of entry into prostitution is not adulthood—it is between 12 and 14 years old. For boys and LGBTQ+ youth, it may be even younger. That is not a career decision. That is child sexual abuse, often dressed up as survival.
🧠 2. Traffickers Target Neglected Children
Pimps, exploiters, digital creators, and traffickers don’t randomly select people. They profile children—especially those already living in chaos:
• Children in foster care
• Children with abusive or absent parents
• Children who have run away to escape violence
• Children who’ve been made to feel invisible at home
These children don’t “run toward prostitution.” They’re running from something else.
😔 3. Shame Is a Weapon—and It Begins at Home
A child who grows up being blamed for being “fast” or “too grown” may internalize that shame. When abuse is normalized, so is self-blame.
And that shame doesn’t go away when the body grows up. It just follows her into adulthood—quiet, heavy, and misunderstood.
🚨 4. Many Survivors Were Groomed, Not Informed
Grooming doesn’t always look like force. It can look like love, praise, opportunity, or a fake promise of freedom.
Traffickers know how to make a brokenhearted child feel seen—until they’re trapped.
🧩 5. Parental Neglect Creates Vulnerabilities
Many Survivors speak of being neglected, not just abused. When no one listens, no one protects, and no one notices—you learn to fend for yourself. That means you’re ripe for predators who promise you a new name, a new life, or a new kind of love.
🔥 6. Systemic Racism Deepens the Harm
Black, Indigenous, Latina, and other girls are more likely to be criminalized than protected. Instead of asking, “What happened to her?” systems ask, “What crime did she commit?” We punish the wounded. We lock up the Survivors. We let the predators walk.
⚖️ 7. Criminal Records Hide Survival Stories
Many women carrying the label of “prostitute” were once girls trying to survive a world that didn’t believe them.
They don’t need more labels. They need justice, healing, and access to housing, mental health care, and safety.
🧱 8. Survival Is Not Consent
Just because someone stayed doesn’t mean they agreed.
Just because someone smiled doesn’t mean they wanted it.
Survivors do what they must to stay alive. That’s not consent. That’s survival.
✊🏾 9. We Must Interrupt This Cycle Sooner
Prevention is not just a classroom presentation. It means:
• Listening to children the first time they say they feel unsafe
• Creating safe spaces that don’t ask children to prove they were hurt
• Training adults to recognize the difference between autonomy and abandonment
🌱 10. Healing Begins with Truth, Not Judgment
When a woman says, “I was in the life,” she doesn’t need your debate, hate, or dissection.
She needs truth-tellers.
She needs safety.
She needs someone to say, “You didn’t deserve what happened. And it’s not your fault.”
🕊️ 11. This Is Bigger Than One Woman—It’s a System
From music to media, from family silence to court systems that dismiss abuse, the pipeline from childhood trauma to adult exploitation is long—and it is built by design.
But it is not unchangeable. We can tear it down. We must.
✨Closing Words:
To the Survivor reading this—you may have never been told this before:
You were never a problem to be punished.
You were a child who needed protection.
And even now, you still deserve protection, compassion, and peace.
This truth belongs to you now.
🔗 Call to Action:
As you are able, let’s hold our schools, political leaders, organizations, and corporations accountable:
The solutions must be practical, protective, and focused on prevention—not ideological.
We need common sense. We need compassion. We need courage.
