Why Does the Racist Masculinization of Women Obligate Us to Fight for Others—But Not the Other Way Around?

Remember when you were little and another kid hit you. Maybe you yelled back at the other kid. The adults would overhear the commotion and make both

Remember when you were little and another kid hit you. Maybe you yelled back at the other kid. The adults would overhear the commotion and make both of you apologize to one another. Except, you didn’t hit anybody so the response seemed unfair.

Well this is worse. Adult Black women continue to be hit with ancient and ignorant slurs by men. Instead of society telling men that all of this was wrong then and it is wrong now. We have women quoting MLK Jr out of context, and telling us to “be kind” to rude and vile men. Because “we should understand what it feels like to be left out.” The nerve!

Throughout history, Black women, in particular, have been burdened with the expectation to fight for everyone’s liberation—often at the expense of our own. One of the most insidious ways this plays out today is through the racist masculinization of women, which not only attempts to erase our womanhood but also demands our labor while denying us reciprocity.

The Burden of Always Fighting

Black women have always been at the frontlines of justice movements, from civil rights to feminism, from labor rights to LGBTQ+ activism. We are expected to extend our hands, our resources, our time—without hesitation. But when the fight is about us, when we ask for solidarity in return, we are often met with silence, dismissal, or outright hostility.

This is particularly evident in how discussions around gender identity unfold. We are told that we must fight for men who say that they identify as women, that our advocacy must be unquestioning of them, that our spaces must be open, and that our concerns must be secondary. Yet, if men who say that they identify as women truly believe there is a connection between our struggles, where is their fight for Black women? Where is the expectation that they will stand in solidarity with us as we battle:

racialized misogyny,
pay gaps,
medical racism,
abuse-to-prison pipeline,
closing doors on educational and employment opportunities,
reproductive injustice,
and the constant attempts to redefine womanhood without our consent?

The Racist Attempts at Erasure of Black Women’s Womanhood

The masculinization of Black women is not new. It has been used to justify our exclusion, our exploitation, and our erasure. From the stereotype of the “strong Black woman” who doesn’t need protection to the outright dehumanization of our bodies, society has long sought to deny us the full experience of womanhood. Now, in the current discourse on gender, that vile attempt at erasure continues.

Why is it that our womanhood is always questioned, but we are told to never question anything in return? Why does a movement that demands inclusion so often fail to extend that same principle to women fighting against sexism and misogyny?

A Call for Reciprocity

Too many movements incorporate Black women into their strategy—not out of genuine solidarity, but as a calculated tactic—without asking us, considering our needs, or ever intending to reciprocate. Still viewing us as labor on demand and on command, rather than fully realized human beings worthy of respect. Are they truly in solidarity with us, or are they simply using our labor, like so many other groups before them? The time has come for honest answers. Who stands with Black women? Who fights for us? And why, in a world where we have always had to carry so much, are we still expected to carry even more—while others do not feel the same responsibility in return?