Table of Contents
Meet Black Survivors, advocates, and healing practitioners sharing their experiences with self-care, aromatherapy, body awareness, and reclaiming peace after trauma.
Sometimes healing begins with something as ordinary as a warm bath.
A favorite fragrance. A quiet room. Fresh sheets. A little music playing while you prepare for bed. The pleasure of caring for your body without rushing, without fear, and without anybody demanding something from you.
For someone who has lived through violence or abuse, these ordinary pleasures can take on new meaning.
And I think we ought to talk about that more.
We spend so much time discussing what Survivors have endured that we sometimes forget to ask what they are enjoying now. What makes them smile? What brings comfort into their homes? What have they discovered that helps them feel more at ease in their own bodies?
Not every conversation about surviving abuse needs to return us to the worst thing that happened.
Sometimes we can learn from women who are finding new ways to live.
I recently began exploring the use of essential oils, aromatherapy, and other gentle wellness practices. That curiosity led me to several Black women whose stories deserve a wider audience.
Some are Survivors who have spoken publicly about their experiences. Others are advocates, educators, and practitioners who have devoted their work to supporting people affected by trauma.
Their approaches are not all the same. And that is part of what makes these women worth getting to know.
1. Jimanekia Eborn: Learning to Feel at Home in Your Own Body
Jimanekia Eborn is a Black trauma educator, sexual assault advocate, and founder of Tending the Garden, an organization created to support Survivors from marginalized communities.
Her work encourages conversations about healing that recognize the whole person, including the body, relationships, sexuality, community, and the freedom to make personal choices.
In a March 2022 interview, Jimanekia Eborn on the Spiritual Practice of a Bath, she discussed using baths and different oils as part of her personal rituals.
I appreciate the simplicity of that.
For some Survivors, reconnecting with their bodies can be complicated. When another person has violated your boundaries, even ordinary experiences involving touch, closeness, or physical vulnerability may feel different afterward.
A bath can become an opportunity to make choices for yourself. You decide the temperature. You decide whether to add oils. You decide how long to stay and when you are ready to leave.
There is something meaningful about being able to say, “This is what I enjoy,” and having that choice respected.
Jimanekia’s reflections also remind us that healing practices do not have to look the same for everyone. What comforts one person may not comfort another.
Her interview discusses oils in bathing rituals, although it does not establish that they were specifically aromatherapy essential oils.
Get to know her: Jimanekia Eborn on the Spiritual Practice of a Bath
You may also enjoy exploring her work through Tending the Garden.
2. Adaku Utah: Healing Can Include Our Culture, Our Bodies, and Our Communities
Adaku Utah is the founder of Harriet’s Apothecary, a Black-centered healing collective that brings together community care, cultural traditions, and holistic wellness.
In an Essence article about Black women recovering from sexual assault, Utah discussed how healing changes over time.
Her work with Survivors has incorporated practices such as meditation, plant-based preparations, oils, tinctures, breathwork, movement, and opportunities to grieve.
What interests me about her approach is that it makes room for more than one kind of support.
Black women have long drawn upon family traditions, community knowledge, faith, music, movement, and the natural world for comfort. Those traditions deserve thoughtful attention, even as we distinguish personal wellness practices from treatments supported by medical evidence.
And healing does not always happen in isolation.
Sometimes a woman needs privacy. Sometimes she needs professional counseling. Sometimes she needs to sit among other women who understand what she has lived through without requiring her to explain every detail.
Utah’s work recognizes the importance of community and the different ways people seek comfort and connection.
She is featured here as a practitioner who works with Survivors. The referenced article does not establish her personal Survivor history or identify all the oils used in her work as essential oils.
Get to know her: Essence: Healing Trauma After Sexual Assault
3. Ruqayyah Abdul-Rahim Oliver: Turning Personal Experience Into Service
Ruqayyah Abdul-Rahim Oliver has spoken publicly about surviving sexual assault and domestic violence.
She went on to become a massage therapist, entrepreneur, and trauma Survivor coach.
In a 2021 interview with The Black Girl Business Bar, she discussed her experiences and how they influenced her desire to help other women.
I find something encouraging about women who discover new interests and possibilities after surviving terrible experiences.
Not because suffering was necessary to make them strong or wise. It wasn’t.
And certainly not because every Survivor owes the world an inspirational story.
But because violence does not get to decide the rest of a woman’s life.
Ruqayyah’s work involves helping women reconnect with their bodies and explore wellness practices. Her professional experience with massage and body-centered care makes her story relevant to this conversation, although I could not verify that she personally uses essential oils.
There is another lesson here.
We can appreciate the knowledge Survivors bring to their work without expecting every Survivor to become a counselor, advocate, or healer.
Some women will devote their lives to helping others. Some will choose entirely different paths.
Both deserve to live well.
Get to know her: How Ruqayyah Abdul-Rahim Oliver Turned Her Trauma Into Service
4. Christy White and Chloe Panta: Reclaiming the Everyday Pleasures of Life
An October 2023 article published by Word in Black explored how Black women practice self-care after surviving domestic violence.
The article featured Christy White and Chloe Panta, who discussed experiences of rebuilding their lives and finding comfort through personal practices.
Among the approaches described were setting boundaries, making time for rest, breathing exercises, and enjoying fragrances and other small pleasures.
I particularly appreciate seeing conversations about healing move into everyday life.
Because sometimes people speak about Survivors as though we are permanently standing in the doorway of our worst experiences.
We are also living.
We are making breakfast, listening to music, raising children, pursuing careers, making friends, discovering new interests, and learning what we like.
A woman might find comfort in wearing her favorite perfume again. Another may discover that she enjoys quiet mornings without conversation. Someone else may begin taking walks, painting, gardening, or learning to cook something new.
Those choices belong to them.
Christy and Chloe’s experiences offer readers a chance to hear Black women discuss life beyond violence in their own words.
The article does not establish that either woman uses essential oils specifically, but their reflections on fragrance and self-care belong in this broader conversation.
Get to know them: Word in Black: How to Practice Self-Care After Surviving Domestic Violence
What These Women Can Teach Us About Healing
One of the things I appreciate about these stories is that they introduce us to women we might never have encountered otherwise.
And isn’t that part of the beauty of the internet?
Somewhere, another woman is sharing something she learned. She may be a professional practitioner, a longtime advocate, or someone who simply found a comforting routine and decided to tell others about it.
We do not have to adopt every practice to appreciate her experience.
We can listen, learn, explore, and decide what belongs in our own lives.
That is especially important when discussing trauma.
Essential oils and aromatherapy may provide pleasant sensory experiences and help some people relax. Research into their effectiveness for trauma-related conditions remains limited, and they are not substitutes for appropriate medical care, counseling, or other evidence-based support.
Scents can also carry powerful memories. Lavender may remind one woman of her grandmother’s home while reminding another of an unpleasant experience.
There is no universal fragrance for healing.
And nobody should feel pressured to use something simply because other people find it comforting.
Black Women Deserve More Conversations About Pleasure, Comfort, and Peace
I want to see more conversations about what Black women enjoy.
We have written extensively about our struggles, our responsibilities, our resilience, and our ability to keep going under extraordinary circumstances.
Those conversations have their place.
But Black women also deserve conversations about softness, curiosity, rest, beauty, laughter, creativity, and pleasure.
We deserve opportunities to learn from women who are exploring different ways to care for themselves.
And we deserve to discover things simply because they interest us.
Not every activity needs to become a lesson in survival. Sometimes we can enjoy something because it smells good, feels pleasant, or makes an ordinary Tuesday a little brighter.
I also hope we continue creating opportunities for Survivors to find one another.
There is something special about discovering another woman’s story and recognizing a possibility you had not considered before.
You might learn about a helpful organization, a wellness practice, a book, a podcast, or a woman whose work speaks to something you have been trying to understand.
You might simply enjoy meeting someone new through her words.
That is reason enough to keep sharing these stories.
Your life deserves more than survival. It deserves room for discovery, comfort, joy, and all the beautiful ordinary experiences that make a life your own.
And if a warm bath, a lovely fragrance, or a few quiet moments become part of that life, I hope you enjoy them.
You have every right to.
At Survivor Affirmations, we believe Survivors deserve safety, dignity, encouragement, and opportunities to build lives filled with meaning and joy. Explore more reflections and resources at SurvivorAffirmations.com.
