The Reality of Bodily Autonomy Violence isn't just a social issue—it is a physical violation that disrupts a person's ability to exist in the world.
The Reality of Bodily Autonomy
Violence isn’t just a social issue—it is a physical violation that disrupts a person’s ability to exist in the world. 
Bodies Compete: In a world with finite resources and space, the “competition” often squeezes out or physically overpowers the most vulnerable—women and children. Nearly everyone knows this until it benefits us not to.
Safety as a Prerequisite: Safety isn’t a luxury or a “bonus” right; it is the fundamental requirement for a body to function, heal, and grow. Without it, the nervous system remains in a state of survival, which impacts everything from personal health to community stability.
Justice as Restoration: If the body is the site of the harm, then justice must be the mechanism that restores agency to that body. It’s about more than just punishment; it’s about acknowledging the physical debt owed to those who have been violated.
Centering the Human Element
It’s not about being “against” someone’s existence; it’s about being for the protection of the physical vessels we all inhabit. Especially the people we go to most for nurturing, compassion, and empathy. Women.
When we constantly demand “nurturing” without offering protection or reciprocity, we aren’t just asking for a favor; we are depleting the very people we claim to value.
The Myth of the “Infinite Well”
There is a dangerous cultural assumption that the compassion of women and girls is an infinite well. This narrative serves to justify:
Emotional Overburdening: Expecting women to “understand” or “forgive” the very violence and systemic neglect they are subjected to.
The “Nurturer” Trap: Conditioning girls from a young age to prioritize the comfort of others over their own physical and emotional safety.
Lack of Reciprocity: Creating a world where women provide the “social glue” that holds communities together, while those same communities fail to provide the justice and safety those women need for their own bodies to rest.
Reciprocity as Justice
If, bodies require safety, then a body that is constantly nurturing others while being denied its own security is a body in a state of perpetual trauma.
True justice for women and girls isn’t just the absence of violence; it’s the presence of a support system that pours back into them. It means:
Active Protection: Moving beyond “thanking” women for their strength and instead building the structures that ensure they don’t have to be so resilient just to survive.
Redistributing Labor: Ensuring that empathy and caretaking are communal responsibilities, not a gendered tax.
Honoring Boundaries: Recognizing that a “no” from a woman or girl is a necessary act of bodily autonomy, not a failure of character or being “mean” or “uninformed.”
It’s a heavy irony: society seeks “healing” from the very people it refuses to protect. We cannot keep asking for the heart of the home or the community to be soft when the world outside remains so jagged for them.
It doesn’t have to be us vs. them…..where “us” is ALWAYS a female human being.
The world doesn’t have to keep coming to the same well.
The world doesn’t have to keep requiring that women and children constantly give, and give, and give, and then give some more:
- in war
- in peace
- in homes, neighborhoods, and schools
- in competition
- in the workplace
- on the stage
- in every industry
- in governments
- from girlhood days on
- with her body via female genital mutilation to please a man “someday”
- to marry a man when she is still a damn child
- to keep secrets around abuse to protect him, the family, the church, the school, the community, the music, the legacy, his feelings, and dominance.
- from our pockets
- from our aging bodies
- from our aching bodies
- from our dead bodies
We matter. We did not come here to be comfort keepers and body guards.
Affirmations for Bodily Sovereignty as a Female Human Being
My body is a sanctuary to be protected, not a resource to be harvested.
I honor the physical requirement of my safety before I attend to the needs of the world.
My existence is not a public utility; I am the sole proprietor of my energy.
I deserve a world that guards my peace as fiercely as it seeks my compassion.
Affirmations for Reciprocity and Limits
I release the myth of the infinite well; my empathy has boundaries, and those boundaries are holy.
I am worthy of a love that pours back into me, not just a love that asks of me.
I prioritize my own advancement; my growth is as vital as my nurturing.
I refuse to be “the glue” at the expense of my own wholeness.
Affirmations for Justice and Opportunity
My wellness is a prerequisite for my presence, not a reward for my exhaustion.
I claim my right to opportunity and ambition; my dreams are not secondary to others’ comforts.
Justice is not a request I make; it is a debt owed to my body and my spirit.
I am a living being meant for expansion, not just a vessel for the service of others.
A Note for the Soul: You might find it helpful to choose the one that feels the most “uncomfortable” to say—that is usually where the deepest reclamation needs to happen. Use these as a “somatic check-in” to remind yourself that your safety is the foundation upon which everything else is built.