Reckoning Is Not Chaos. It Is Correction.(w/Affirmations)
We arrived here because too many people rush to shield their favorite men instead of listening to the harmed. We can stop. Right now.
We arrived here [...]
They Weren’t Just Controlling—They Were Consuming
Survivors often face: the coercion to disappear inside someone else’s reflection.
Some people weren’t looking for love.They were looking for someon [...]
RECANT: She Just Wanted Her Life Back
There is a lot going on in the world. But the pain of sexual violence, and the complicated aftermath that follows, never hits “pause.” It doesn’t wa [...]
No Gratitude, No Quilt: A Lesson from My Mama (and a Little Fried Chicken)
*Updated for 2025 Several months ago, my mom asked me to pick up some hair accessories like the ones she saw me wearing. Naturally, I did.
B [...]
Missing Black Girls: Still Invisible
How dare you make laws and policies that make our girls less safe!-Tonya GJ Prince Every single year, thousands of Black girls vanish from our comm [...]
Stay Out of Her Healing, You Weren’t There.
This is not about whether you think she was right or wrong.This is not about your definition of accountability.This is not about your fantasy version [...]
When the Mask Matters More Than the Truth, Survivors Are Asked to Disappear
There is a reason people cling so tightly to labels when harm is exposed.
Often, it is not confusion.
It is fear. Fear of admitting they were mis [...]
.png "What To Remember When You Check on Your Stong Friend Who Was Assaulted")
What To Remember When You Check on Your Stong Friend Who Was Assaulted
It is incredibly difficult to share with someone that you know. "I was abused.""I was victimized.""I was attacked.""I was assaulted." [...]
They Can’t Always Find the Right Words. But They Still Deserve to Be Heard.
Sometimes Survivors speak in whispers.Sometimes in long pauses, in shaking hands, in misplaced laughter.Sometimes… not at all.
But let me tell you so [...]
Letter from an Angry Survivor of Sexual Violence about this Bill Cosby Tragedy
7/7/2015 Tonight I am angry.
That isn't my default setting though. Usually, I smile so much that I have to consciously tell myself not to d [...]
The One Question Every Parent of a Girl Must Ask Themselves
Memory Lane (2000's) “No!” “Nobody kisses me! Except my mother, my Grammy, my Aunt Kisha, my LaLa, my Nanny, my Dada, my Gma,” (and the list went [...]
Black Women: Unshakable, Unstoppable, Undeniable
When people build entire campaigns against you, they recognize your power even if YOU do not.
Black womanhood has never been up for debate. It has ne [...]
30 Red Flags of Unsafe People: How to Spot Them Early
Some people are simply unsafe. Whether in personal relationships, workplaces, social settings, movements, politics, or online spaces, unsafe individ [...]
.png "Why Does Society Make it Difficult for Survivors of Rape & Abuse to Come Forward? Part 2")
Why Does Society Make it Difficult for Survivors of Rape & Abuse to Come Forward? Part 2
Original post 9/23/15 7. Every choice that you ever made (sexually) is scrutinized. They have questions.
Q: How many i [...]
Keeping Girls Safe in a Dangerous World (ebook) 2025 UPDATE
In a world where girls face unique dangers and challenges, Keeping Girls Safe in a Dangerous World is a guide for parents, caregivers, and [...]
Sarah Palin Was Right—This Time
I don’t know if she and I will ever agree again.But today, on this?We stand on the same side of the truth. I Am a Survivor.
I survived m [...]
How to Get the Truth Around Obstacles of Myths, Lies, & Distraction: Infographics
Let Me Tell ItI once worked as the sexual assault Outreach Advocate for the state of Virginia. Here is what I learned. What one thing [...]
Unveiling the Sneaky Strategies of Child Predators: Protect Your Child with these Expert Insights
elink.io | See Original [...]
Divine Work: Confronting Silence Around Abuse in Church Communities
elink.io | See Original [...]
Child Sex Abuse is NOT a Team Sport (video short)
If you are serious about preventing violence against children, you can't approach it like a team sporting event. There are groomers & pedoph [...]
The Faux Fight Against Child Sex Abuse
Last May was one of the happiest days of my entire life.My son graduated from high school. I sat there among the other proud family members as the ban [...]
6 Smart Tactics to Help Survivors Strengthen Confidence
People who have been abused often struggle with self-doubt. Yeah. You can put up a tough exterior for everyone else. Some days you can even [...]
5 Reasons Why the Silence Around Abuse Isn't Golden
They say "silence is golden". No, it isn't, it's tarnished and rusty on the edges. At least when it comes to abuse it is.Allow m [...]
![Why “Not a [Insert Person]” Is Dangerous for Survivors](https://wesurviveabuse.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/08/main-qimg-542d12514cab2ff36b83668c32a48264.jpg "Why “Not a [Insert Person]” Is Dangerous for Survivors")
Why “Not a [Insert Person]” Is Dangerous for Survivors
Let’s tell the truth:Adults have power. Children don’t.
Even the most vulnerable adult usually has more access to voice, resources, legal systems, an [...]
.png "Learning from the Loudon County Tragedy (updated)")
Learning from the Loudon County Tragedy (updated)
(Updates below) Remember when they yelled: "This never happens." This tragedy was always preventable.Reaction audio: 4:23Grand ju [...]
Stop Calling Children “Underage Women”: How Language Is Used to Soften Harm Against Girls
No.
We are not doing that word-washing anymore. Not after what we had to read. Not after people had to live through.....or not live thr [...]
Is Your Child Advocacy Child-Centered or Adult-Centered?
Child advocacy means supporting and promoting the rights and well-being of children. When advocating for children, it's essential to ensure [...]
Rethinking ‘Capitalist’: Point It Toward Human Traffickers, Not Black Communities
For the love of money.......
Some of us grew up knowing what capitalist meant.It wasn’t a cheap clapback.It was a serious word—meant to name and ch [...]
Why Blaming Porn Alone Won’t End Violence Against Women
When we treat symptoms as causes, harm finds new ways to grow.
When we face the root, we begin to change what is possible.
When We Make Po [...]
How We Are Getting Played by Rapists & Abusers
Updated from 7/1/15The Pied PiperWhen I was a kid, there was a "children's story" that scared me to death.The Pied Piper was a story based o [...]
High Five from WESurvive: 3 Crucial Life Lessons from Survivor LaQuisha Hall
Survivors are my favorite people. Hands down, no contest. I love their war stories, their wisdom, their testimony. They inspire me. I [...]
Mirror Reflections: How What We Don’t Know About Suicide is Killing People
updated from 7/1/2015
According to the CDC: In 2013 (the most recent year for which full data are available), 41,149 suicides wer [...]
Coercive Sex Trafficking: What People Don’t Understand
That line is more fragile than people think.
Too many people in the U.S. still picture sex trafficking as some shadowy van pulling up to snatch a g [...]
I Will Survive: How Survivor Gloria Gaynor Keeps Inspiring Decades After the Release of Grammy Winning Song
originally published 2/8/ 2016At First I Was Afraid... When we have been wounded we must heal. To do that, I think we all use a combination of&n [...]
A Society That Centers Harmful Males Will Never Have Trust—And It Doesn’t Deserve It
Trust is not a gift.Trust is built.Earned.Sustained through action, protection, and accountability.
But what happens when a society builds its laws [...]
We Called It Rape Culture for a Reason. And That Reason Still Exists
There was a time when we named things clearly.
We called it rape culture.
Not to be provocative. Not to shock. Not to divide.
But to survive.
We u [...]
⚠️ Trigger Warning: Child Sexual Abuse, Victim-Blaming
Updated for 2025 Updated from 2016: I was watching one of my favorite shows—Greenleaf on OWN. If you’ve ever watched it, you know [...]
Why Do Men Kill Women?
“When the truth is too loud to ignore, the world calls it discomfort. We call it survival.”
Why do men kill women?
Too often, it’s not because o [...]
Did You Hear the Joke about Blue Ivy, Brown Girls & Sexual Abuse? ME NEITHER
updated from August 2015
People often assume that if you’re bold on the page, you must be loud in person.
But many of us who speak boldly in p [...]
What Racists and Child Rape Apologists Have in Common
Seems like all you have to do is make one simple statement:The problem of black men who prey upon black girls/boys must be discussed and addresse [...]
The Truth About Catfishing: It’s Not Harmless. It’s Harm.
Catfishing isn’t just a little lie or a “lonely person trying to connect.” It’s deception wrapped in manipulation.
People build entire false identiti [...]
Consent Is Not an Afterthought. It Is the First Requirement
from WeSurviveAbuse.com
Let’s make this plain:Consent is not a footnote.It is not a favor.It is not a vibe, a guess, or something you assume after yo [...]
Manhood Won’t Shatter If We Tell the Truth
There are men who prey on men. Go ahead and get the gasp out of the way.
Because this seems to be a truth everybody sees but is afraid to say out lou [...]
Male Indecent Exposure: Ensuring the Safety of Young Girls
Male indecent exposure refers to the act of exposing one's genitals with an explicit intention to shock, intimidate, or sexually harass others. [...]
FAQ: Common Perpetrators, Race, and Bias — What U.S. Parents Must Know About CSAM
You can't find what you are not looking for.
Knowledge is power. And when adults refuse to see the truth, perpetrators are protected, children are [...]
🕊️ We Will Always Choose the Child: Culture Cannot Justify Harm
In the United States, there has always been a clash between cultural beliefs and the safety of the child. We just happen to be diverse like that.
[...]
Beyond the Perpetrator: It’s Not About Who Harmed, It Is About THE Harm (Podcast)
Survivor and victim's advocate Tonya GJ Prince addresses how making assumptions about who is or isn't capable of violence silences Survivors of [...]
Sexual Violence Against Black Males: No Video, No Witnesses, and It IS Killing Them
updated from original post on 12/15/2015So last night I Twitter watched one of my favorite shows. A true crime show. You c [...]
What's In a Name: A Survivor of Child Sexual Abuse names Her Rapist
Did I tell y’all about that time that they printed a speech I delivered in public in the paper? Well, that isn’t even the most interestin [...]
Survivor Q & A: What Do You Mean by “Sacred Castes” in Violence & Abuse? (video)
updated 2025
Below are 10 signs of a “sacred caste”—a group, ideology, or identity that becomes exempt from criticism, even when doing harm [...]
Familiarity Doesn’t Make Stranger Abuse Irrelevant
There’s a manipulation tactic that keeps slipping into our public conversations—one that says: “Most people are abused by someone they know… so [...]
What FGM and “Gender-Critical” Child Medicalization Have in Common
In the work of protecting children, hard truths often sit at the intersection of culture, medicine, and power. And in that intersection, those of us w [...]
.png "Child Centering vs Personal Interest Centering: Only One of These Keeps Kids Safe (video)")
Child Centering vs Personal Interest Centering: Only One of These Keeps Kids Safe (video)
What happened to those girls in Loudon County was always preventable. Remember folks yelling: "This never happens." For the sake of th [...]
The Right to Say “NO” is Mine: Youth Edition (video)
Same Game, Different Day: Violating Women's and Children's Rights | WE Survive AbuseIsn't It Refreshing When a Man "Gets It"? | WE Survive AbuseSurviv [...]
How Fame Shields Harm: Why Children Are Ignored Until Adult Comfort Is Threatened
Many entertainers are protected in our culture. They are called “artists.”
They are called “talented.”
They are called “important.” So whe [...]
🛑 Stop Saying “Men Wouldn’t Go That Far to Abuse Women
Please stop telling Survivors that "men wouldn’t go through the trouble of dressing up as women just to abuse women."
We’ve heard it too many times [...]
Why We Must Stop Centering Discomfort Over Male-on-Male Sexual Violence
When a male accuses another male of sexual harassment or assault, what do we often hear first? “The worst part is people are going to call him ga [...]
6 FAQ by Parents & Caretakers about Child Sexual Abuse
Today, I would like to speak to the parents and caretakers of children. I realize that some of them might be a bit concerned. When someone [...]
Only 2% “Owned” Slaves?” The Dangerous Game of Subtracting Context
We’ve all heard it: “Only 2% of white people "owned" slaves.”It’s a talking point tossed around to downplay history. But here’s the truth: it’s not th [...]
Women Have Every Right to Feel Safe Even If That Annoys You
Immediately following the height of #MeToo women and girls have been inundated with messages like "be kind".
If #MeToo got us talking and [...]
Why Saying ‘Not This Person’ Endangers Children More Than It Protects Truth
Enough! Enough rushing to protect your favorite men. Isn't that how we got here?
There is a new trend here in the West and I hope it does not catch o [...]
Please Stop Signaling Support to Grown Men Accused of Harming Children
Start Showing Up for the People Who Need It Most
When someone is arrested for harming a child,we do not need adults jumping online or into rooms to s [...]
.png "Scouts Honor: The Secret Files of Boy Scouts of America is on Netflix")
Scouts Honor: The Secret Files of Boy Scouts of America is on Netflix
This is another MUST-SEE! From this storytelling perspective we can see: Avoidance & discouragement of parental notificati [...]