❓ FAQ: Why Is It Sexist to Dismiss Women’s Boundaries and Need for Safety?
Q: Is it really sexist to question or challenge women-only spaces?
A: Yes. Dismissing, undermining, or demanding access to women-only spaces—especial [...]
Until This Country Reckons with How It Treats Black People, It Will Never Heal Its Violence
Until this country reckons with how it treats Black people—how its systems treat Black people—how it still treats Black women carrying chronic illness [...]
Don’t Share My Scars and Then Ask for My Help.
Let’s talk about something that happens all too often—especially to women, especially to Survivors.
Someone insults us.Mocks us.Lies about us.Disre [...]
Unburdened: Breaking the Chains of Servitude and Reclaiming Rest for Black Women
Breaking these chains requires a multi-layered approach that includes self-liberation, community support, and cultural shifts. Black women can break [...]
You’re Not Her Judge. You’re Not Even Helpful.
🖤 WeSurviveAbuse.com
The internet is full of people who think that offering opinions on a Survivor’s choices is the same as offering help.It’s not. [...]
Bullies and Cowards: A Natural Alliance in the Abuse of Women and Vulnerable Adults
If there is one thing history, society, and personal experience have proven time and again, it’s that bullies and cowards are natural allies. They m [...]
When Women’s Murders Are Hijacked: How Race, Politics, and Silence Derail the Fight Against Male Violence
Too often, when a woman is murdered, the conversation shifts quickly away from her life, her safety, and the systemic failures that left her vulnera [...]
Remembering the Women Silenced by Political Violence in America (w/womanist film recommendations)
💡 Pattern to Notice: Most of these women were killed not just for themselves but because they stood between power and the vulnerable—protecting m [...]
The “Helper” Mandate is Hurting Us
It whispers to Black people—especially Black women —that we are here to help.To soothe.To teach.To forgive.To make the world softer for others, even w [...]
Gender Critical Thinkers: How Can We Speak of Freedom When So Many Women Still Can’t Speak at All?
A womanist does not enter this conversation as a spectator — we enter it as those who have lived inside the body that the world debates.
Long before [...]
🔥 When They Take It All Back: Why Some Survivors Recant
Updated for WeSurviveAbuse.com, 2025
Let’s return to this uncomfortable truth: when victims of sexual violence recant, it is often not because th [...]
Weaponized Witnessing: When They Watch You Fall, But Never Help You Rise
There’s a kind of watching that doesn’t come from love.A kind of watching that waits for you to stumble—not to catch you,but to collect the footage. [...]
Privacy Is Not Prejudice. It’s Protection.
Somewhere along the way, somebody got bold enough to say it out loud:"That makes me uncomfortable."
She said it gently at first.A whisper in the lock [...]
Public Humiliation Is Not Entertainment: How Shame Becomes a Tool of Control
“Don’t let folks play in your face.”-Black Proverb
Public humiliation is often dismissed as personality conflict, humor, or spectacle.
But humiliati [...]
Love Doesn’t Mean Lying: I Can Respect You and Still Speak the Truth
If you think I have to choose between truth and respect,You underestimate the power of both.
See, real love doesn't demand silence.Real respect doesn [...]
Future-Proofing Your Mind in an Unpredictable World
From guest contributor Jonathan Garner/shamekills.info. This blog post contains affiliate links. If you click on these links and make a purchase, [...]
Overcoming Insecurities for Women
Living with insecurities can be an incredibly difficult experience for women. It can be even worse if you are unaware of what is causing those in [...]
Calling Out the Undermining of Women and Children’s Rights
"We are living in times so strange that truth sounds like conspiracy, and kindness feels like rebellion."— Unknown Jonah Wheeler has been lec [...]
Affirmations for Strength and Boundaries Around Black Women’s Humanity: Rooted in Baldwin’s Wisdom
"We can disagree and still love each other, unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression
and denial of my humanity and right to exist."
-Jame [...]
You Shrink So Others Don’t Feel Threatened
But What Happens When You Stop?
The Sign:You minimize your gifts, your pain, your truth—because you’ve been told your full presence makes people unco [...]
Healing Beyond the Pain: Exploring the Latest Technologies in Treating PTSD
For Survivors of abuse and violence, the road to healing from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is deeply personal and often fraught with ch [...]
How to Support Lesbian Friends in Abusive Relationships
As an advocate, you become familiar with the careful way that a woman tells you her story. She's testing your waters. Are you safe? Are you judgment [...]
The Healing Isn’t in the Headlines. It’s in the Listening
There is a rhythm that the media loves:Shock. Outrage. Silence.A Survivor comes forward.The story catches fire.It lands in headlines, hashtags, and tr [...]
Violence Against Women Always Looks for an Inside Woman
Like most acts of violence against women,invasion of boundaries doesn’t just show up with brute force.It counts on betrayal.It counts on a hand extend [...]
🌿 Faith, Healing, and the Work of Safe People
People who support Survivors—from all walks of life—should know this:
many Survivors are people of faith. Not all. But many. Some draw stre [...]
Perpetrator Fragility: When He Fears Exposure More Than Reflection
Perpetrator fragility is a concept used to describe how individuals—most often abusers or those in power—respond with defensiveness, victim-playing, o [...]
Red Flag #1: If They Won’t Let You Have Privacy, They Don’t See You as Human
When Privacy Is Forbidden—It’s a Deadly Warning
Some people believe that their partners, children, or family members do not deserve privacy. That bel [...]
🎤💰 Money, Respect & the Woman’s Mic: Black Women’s Songs About Money, Power, and Respect
updated from April 2025
"We're supposed to pretend that if we are "good girls," a "good man" will find us and give us everything that we want. [...]
🎭 The Enforcer in the Room: When Women Police Other Women for Abusers
"I will give you something to cry out about"
There is something few people want to talk about—but every Survivor knows it.
In systems of abuse and e [...]
Who Benefits From My Silence?
Every time I swallowed the truth, someone else got fed.Fed with power.Fed with protection.Fed with the benefit of the doubt.
But it wasn’t me. [...]
How What We Don't Know About Suicide is Killing People
According to the CDC: In 2013 (the most recent year for which full data are available), 41,149 suicides were reported, making suicide the [...]