There Is No Bad Day to Tell the Truth
To every Survivor who has ever hesitated, second-guessed, or swallowed the truth to protect someone else's comfort:You are not late.You are not wrong. [...]
“The Forgive and Overlook Habit”: Why the Crisis of Child Predators Isn’t Going Anywhere
The crisis of child predators isn’t going anywhere. Unless the adults change our harmful ways and change them right away.
Because the pressure has al [...]
Reclaiming Anna Julia Cooper: Why Black Women’s Liberation Is Not a Call to Self-Sacrifice
1. The Distortion of Cooper’s Vision
Some have taken Cooper’s line to mean that Black women must always be the “gateway,” carrying everyone else on [...]
His Truth Does Not Need a Permission Slip — Even When It Makes People Squirm
This post is dedicated to James Ransone, who died by suicide two weeks after this was written.
James spoke openly about being violated by a tutor in [...]
🚫 STOP ASKING US TO GET USED TO BEING HARMED
People don’t listen to women and children.
Not when we whisper.Not when we scream.Not even when we show up with a mountain of evidence, hospital re [...]
The Old Code of Chains: A Timeline of Control Over Women’s Privacy and Safety
Women who demand male free spaces are not hateful but have you explored the possibility that you may be? Are you carrying on the ancient global wi [...]
You Call It Staying. She Calls It Surviving.
You look at her and ask, “Why did she stay?”
But you don’t know the whole story.
You saw a snapshot.She’s been living the full movie.
To you, it [...]
When One Gets Through, Others Follow: The Open Door Metaphor in Abuse
There’s a pattern in abuse that doesn’t get talked about enough. Not in training rooms. Not in courtrooms. Not even in some support groups. But Surv [...]
The Unseen Cage: What Coercive Control Really Looks Like
Because not all abuse leaves bruises—but it can still steal your freedom.
Some cages are invisible.No bars.No bruises.Just a tightening around your [...]
We Must Unlearn the Misplaced Blame We Inherited
I am a Black woman.I was raised as a Black woman in the United States of America.Raised to be strong, to be smart, to see danger from arou [...]
If the Silencing Isn’t for Women or Children… Then Who Is It For?
Silence is powerful.
It can be sacred. Healing. Necessary for rest, prayer, and wisdom.
But when silence is demanded—not chosen—when it’s forced upo [...]
When the World Misunderstands the Roots of “Choice”: A Survivor-Centered Look at Abuse, Neglect, and Prostitution
Too often, when the topic of prostitution or “sex work” comes up, the first question is: “Why did she choose that?”But I’ve been walking beside Surviv [...]
When “Woman Is a Feeling” Becomes Another Way to Erase Us
When People Say “Woman Is a Feeling,” Something Important Disappears
We know that we were not born to give men feelings. We were made for so much mor [...]
🛑 What the 2023 Supreme Court Stalking Case Means for Women — And Why We Must Act Now
There’s a lot going on in the world right now. The headlines are heavy, the pace is relentless, and it’s easy to feel pulled in a thousand directions. [...]
HE Chose Violence
Blaming women is the usual default setting but if a man is violent, let’s put the blame where it belongs.
Because too many conversations around abus [...]
10 Facts about Missing & Murdered Indigenous Women & Girls
10 Facts About MMIWG by Tonya GJ Prince
Exploring the Dark Side of Festivals: Uncovering the Reali [...]
12 Burdens Growing Up In Dysfunctional Families Teaches You to Accept-and Why We Must Reject Them
In dysfunctional families and abusive relationships, women are often asked—no, expected—to tolerate things that should never be tolerated. These [...]
The Pain They Tell You to Swallow: On Disrespect, Dehumanization, and the Lie of Strength
They say, “Now’s not the time.”They say, “It’s not that serious.”They say, “Be the bigger person.”They say, “Other people have it worse.”
And just li [...]
10 Dangerous Beliefs That Have Harmed Women Around the World
Some lies don’t look like lies.They wear the clothing of “tradition,” “culture,” “love,” or “femininity.”But if you look closer, you’ll see the brui [...]
How Changing Language Around Sex is Used to Undermine Women in Courtrooms
We live in an age of shifting language.A time when even the most basic truths—like what it means to be a woman—are being rewritten, not by science or [...]
When They Can’t Control You Anymore, They Try to Control How People See You
One of the realities of working with women trying to get away from an abusive relationship is the difficult work that must be done long after the brea [...]
Woman You Are Already Enough: A Reminder from Fannie Lou Hamer
In a world where women — especially minoritized women, poor women, disabled women, elder women, and other marginalized women all over the globe — ha [...]
Why Saying ‘Not This Person’ Endangers Children More Than It Protects Truth
Enough! Enough rushing to protect your favorite men. Isn't that how we got here?
There is a new trend here in the West and I hope it does not catch o [...]
Reshona Landfair: Jane Doe in R. Kelly’s sex tape reclaims name and shares her story
Adults. Adults can either create safety or harm. We play a hand in upholding abusers and harmers of children. A larger part than we want to admit. [...]
When Identity Becomes a Shield: Who We Protect When We Pretend Everyone Is Treated Equal
The Lie We Tell to Stay Comfortable
People say: “Rape is rape, it doesn’t matter who did it.” But that has never been true in practice. [...]
Narrative Control: One More Way Survivors Get Silenced
There’s something you need to know about how survivors are treated after they speak out.
It doesn’t always look like disbelief.It doesn’t always look [...]
How Women Can Support Gay Men In Their Lives in Abusive Relationships
Abuse doesn’t care about gender or sexuality. It happens in all kinds of relationships—straight, gay, lesbian, and everything in between. But when it [...]
When They Don’t See You as a Person, They Don’t Protect You as One
The objectification of Black people doesn’t stay on screen.It follows us into courtrooms, hospitals, shelters, and survivor services—places where safe [...]
Black and Missing Foundation and Washington Association of Black Journalists Release Groundbreaking Media Guide for Reporting on Missing Persons
LINK TO FULL PRESS RELEASE (Hyattsville, MD) – The Black and Missing Foundation, Inc. (BAMFI), in partnership with the Washington [...]
When “Nothing Will Happen” Isn’t a Safety Plan: Asking About Real Safeguards
“If your confidence turns out to be misplaced, what protections exist for the people expected to absorb the consequences?” When certainty replaces [...]
Complacency Around Violence and Abuse: A longtime foe against women and children
At some point, complacency feels like betrayal. It is exhausting and deeply painful to be a witness to complacency around violence and abuse. C [...]
Fire Test: When You Ask Women to Support Violence
You are sending forth aspiring leaders who have no history of standing against violence, no record of defending women or children,
no evidence [...]