This past week of women being harmed by fire has left me reflecting upon the women that I have worked with who were scarred, burned, and/or severely i
This past week of women being harmed by fire has left me reflecting upon the women that I have worked with who were scarred, burned, and/or severely injured by men.
Men who hate women think nothing of disfiguring our appearance. If they can’t do that, mocking, ridiculing, and slurring will do.
Then as I watched videos of young men mocking the looks of lawmakers and leaders who dared to assert the rights of women I thought about those women again.
“Do you think YOU look like a woman?”
“I don’t see color”
Yeah, that’s the same thing they yell at Black women who dare to question fairness for all female athletes.
People on social media see it, but only a few courageous women and gay men from all racial backgrounds stand up to it.
When the silencing, slurring, and shutting down of opportunities time comes…..people see color, sex, race, ethnicity, age, size, and visually obvious disability.
There is nothing wrong with seeing differences.
Differences are beautiful!
Differences are natural.
Differences are Divine.
The problem is in all the evil that has been done and is still being done because people fail to respect and appreciate these differences.
Certain privileged folks can choose to pretend to be gender-blind. But when the time comes to silence, oppress, and close all doors to greater opportunities; everyone then knows exactly who the women and girls are.
Feel free to confirm this truth with the women and girls of Kenya, Sudan, India, Haiti, and Afghanistan for starters if you doubt me.
Or, ask the women and girls in the United States’ poor rural & urban areas.
Or talk to the growing numbers of unhoused women and girls in those same areas.
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Being a Woman Is NOT About Approval
Being a woman is not about tailoring your looks to meet the fleeting standards of others.
It’s not about the size of your waist,
the smoothness of your skin,
or the approval that flickers in someone else’s gaze.
Being a woman is about being a female human being. That’s it.
Each female human being deserves to feel just as we are- whole, complete, and deserving of respect simply because you exist.
You need not shrink, alter, or perform to prove your worth.
Your self-love and self-worth are inherent— yours to claim and hold without justification.
Society has long tried to convince us that our value lies in how we are seen.
Whether we are:
- single/married
- tall/short
- young/old
- “wife material”
- “girl next door”
- pretty/cute/average
- dark/light
- Black/Mixed/Jewish/Latina/Asian
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You are more than an image.
You are a person.
You are thoughts, emotions, brilliance, creativity, and complexity.
Your worth is not up for debate.
You are worthy because you are.
So, let’s reject the lie that being a woman is about anyone else’s approval, assessment, or scale.
Let’s embrace the truth: Being a woman is about being. Period.
Respect yourself.
Love yourself.
Value yourself—for no other reason than that you are a female human being.
That is a miracle! (Especially in this world)
And that is more than enough.
