Why Are Black Women Always Told to “Educate” Others?

Because our knowledge is often treated as public property rather than personal wisdom.

There is an unspoken expectation that Black women should always be ready to explain—calmly, patiently, and on demand—what we already live with every day. Our experiences are treated like open-access material instead of hard-earned understanding shaped by history, survival, and deep observation.

We are expected to:

• Explain racism without emotion

• Teach history without fatigue

• Absorb pushback without reaction

• Translate pain into palatable lessons

• Do this work without pay, protection, or pause

All while our own needs go unmet.

This expectation does not come from curiosity alone.
It comes from entitlement.

When people say “educate me,” what they often mean is:

• “Carry this discomfort for me”

• “Do the work so I don’t have to”

• “Make this easy for me”

• “Stay kind while I question your reality”

That is not learning.
That is extraction.

Education is mutual, intentional, and respectful.
Extraction takes without consent and gives nothing back.

Black women are rarely asked whether we have the capacity to teach in that moment. We are rarely asked how much explaining costs us. We are rarely offered care, compensation, or space in return. The assumption is that our labor is endless and our well is bottomless.

It is not.

This constant demand teaches Black women to ignore our own exhaustion. It pressures us to perform clarity while suppressing emotion. It sends the message that our worth lies in what we can provide—not in who we are.

But we are allowed to say no.

We are allowed to protect our energy.
We are allowed to choose rest over explanation.
We are allowed to decide when—and if—we teach.

A grounding truth to hold:

You are not required to educate others at the expense of yourself.
Your knowledge is valuable.
Your boundaries are sacred.
And your care comes first.

Education should never cost you your peace.