There is a kind of violence that doesnât leave bruises.A kind that hides behind charm, culture, tradition, âcommunity.âA kind that preys on the idea t
There is a kind of violence that doesnât leave bruises.
A kind that hides behind charm, culture, tradition, âcommunity.â
A kind that preys on the idea that Black women are unbreakable. “Unrapeable”. Unworthy of protection.
Itâs called coercive controlâand Black women and girls are uniquely vulnerable to it.
đïž Why?
Because from birth, we are often taught to perform strength, not express pain.
To protect others, not ourselves.
To âunderstandâ men, even when they harm us.
To keep the family together, even when it is killing us.
Our love has been weaponized. Our loyalty manipulated.
And when abuse comes wrapped in cultural language, sacred robes, or familiar faces, itâs even harder to name. And even harder to escape.
đ What Makes Us Vulnerable:
âBe kindâ at all costs â kindness without boundaries becomes a cage.
âUnity over everythingâ â unity that silences abuse is not unity; itâs complicity.
âProtect the menâ â when protection of men comes at the cost of women and girls, it is not protectionâitâs patriarchy.
âDonât divide usâ â as if truth-telling is what breaks us, not the harm itself.
Making children perform instead of listening to them â leads to generations of silenced survivors who learn that visibility matters more than voice.
Centering male pain over female truth â turns healing into hierarchy.
These attitudes are not only harmfulâthey are dangerous. They are how cult leaders recruit, how abusers hide, how exploitation festers.
And globally, while every minoritized community has vulnerabilities, Black people must be especially clear about ours. Because if we arenât, we will keep leaving the door open to attackâfrom inside and out.
đŁ This is Not Betrayal. This is Protection.
Calling out harm in our communities is not “airing dirty laundry.”
It is hanging up clean clothes for the next generation.
It is saying: We love us too much to let this go unnamed.
Black women and girls deserve:
Safe love
Accountable community
Spaces where we donât have to trade silence for belonging
đ A Loving Call to Awareness:
Check your reflexes: Do you rush to defend the accused before listening to the harmed?
Check your language: Are you calling women âbitter,â âdivisive,â or âmessyâ when they speak truth?
Check your systems: Are you teaching girls obedienceâor discernment?
We are not only daughters and sisters and mothers. We are whole people.
And we deserve sacred safetyânot conditional silence.
May we love each other enough to listen.
May we protect each other enough to change.
May we believe that Black women and girls are worth fighting forâfully, always, and out loud.
#BelieveBlackWomen #CoerciveControl #HiddenHarm #WeSurviveAbuse #CommunityAccountability #SacredSafety #BlackGirlsDeserveJoy #ProtectTheVulnerable