💔 They’ve Been Ignoring Our Pain for Generations. But We Still Feel It.

On yesterday there was a non-subtle outcry on at least one social media application calling for Black people to go to Los Angeles, California and get involved in the conflict between ICE, the National Guard, the military, and immigrants. Right now there are multiple cars on fire, humans being beaten, politicians in litigation, and it appears violently chaotic.

People are familiar with the hearts and conscience of Black peoples. They know that we care. They know that we love deeply and sincerely. They know that they can depend on all of that to be backed up with action. 

Still, two things stood out:

 One, these seemingly organized requests were not sent to other groups of people.

And two, no one seemed concerned about our safety and well-being. Especially, the women‘s safety. In fact, when several Black women let them know that they were trying to engage in necessary self care and keep families and loved ones safe…..let’s just say that it was not well received. 

All bat signals aside, this community gets really sick and tired of people treating you like a valiant superhero one day, and a villain the very next day. 

There is a pain that doesn’t show up on X-rays.
A wound that never got to scab over, much less heal.
It’s the ache that comes from being disregarded—for generations.

For Black women and Black girls, safety has never been a given.
Not in our homes.
Not in schools.
Not in hospitals.
Not even in movements that claim to fight for “all women.”

The World Ignores Our Cries, Then Asks Why We Whisper

You learn quickly that your tears won’t be met with comfort.
That your fear will be misunderstood as drama.
That your pain will be punished before it’s ever believed.
You start to shrink—not because you want to,
but because it’s how you survive.

Disregard Trains You to Choose Unwellness

When your body says, This hurts, and no one listens,
you start to doubt your own signals.

When your safety is violated and people rush to protect them,
you start to wonder if you even deserve to be protected.

And so it begins:

• You normalize chaos because peace never felt like an option.

• You justify pain because you’ve been told love is supposed to hurt.

• You stay silent because every time you spoke up, someone blamed you for being unsafe.

This is how disregard turns into danger.

They Dismiss Our Illness, Then Demand Our Strength

They say we’re strong.
But what they mean is they expect us to survive without support,
without rest,
without space to fall apart.

Black women’s pain is the most under-treated, under-diagnosed, and under-respected in the medical system.
Our symptoms are ignored.
Our breathless alarms are brushed off.
We are told to “just keep going,”
until we are gone.

And Still, We Are Here

Here’s what they don’t understand:
Black women and girls aren’t still here because we were never hurt.
We’re still here because we refused to let the harm define us.

But surviving isn’t the end of the story.
Healing is.

🖤 To the One Reading This Who Was Disregarded:

I see you.
Your hurt makes sense.
Your choices make sense.
Your story matters.

If they never taught you what safety feels like,
it’s not your fault you didn’t know how to choose it.

If they never told you your pain was real,
believe it now: it is.

If they acted like your life was disposable,
it’s not.
You are sacred.

What We Deserve (and Always Have)

• To be safe in our bodies and our homes

• To have our symptoms taken seriously

• To speak and be believed

• To love and be loved in peace

• To stop running from pain that was never ours to hold

We were never meant to be the world’s mule, its warrior, its scapegoat, or its emotional dumping ground.

We are daughters. We are elders. We are sisters. We are visionaries. We are worth protecting.

You don’t have to keep proving your pain to people committed to ignoring it.

And you don’t have to keep sacrificing yourself for people who only see you as useful when you’re suffering.

You get to choose different now.
You get to say: “Not this time.”
You get to survive—and thrive—on your terms.

✨ 10 Survivor-Centered Affirmations

For when you need to remember: You are your first responsibility.

1. I do not need permission to protect myself. My safety is reason enough.

2. I am allowed to center my healing, even if others don’t understand it.

3. Taking care of myself is not selfish—it is sacred.

4. I can walk away from what harms me without apology or explanation.

5. My boundaries are valid, even when they disappoint others.

6. I am no one’s project or lifeline. I belong to myself first.

7. I do not owe my peace to anyone who disrupted it.

8. My body, my heart, my spirit—these are mine to protect and nurture.

9. Healing is my birthright, and I claim it without shame.

10. I trust myself to choose what’s best for me. I answer to my spirit, not their expectations.

🕯️ Say This With Me:

“From this day on, I will believe in my own safety—even when no one else does. I will build the life they never imagined I could have. I am not invisible. I am not wrong. I am worthy. I deserve peace, joy, and safety. And I claim them all.”

Share if you feel safe and ready—your voice might be the lifeline someone else needs. And if you do share, remember to cite the messenger. Words carry legacy.

[rosaschildren.com] | [wesurviveabuse.com] | [survivoraffirmations.com]