💔 Why Didn’t I Leave Sooner?

Mikey Mercer: I wear orange because I lost a friend to domestic violence and I am not afraid to show everyone, I stand up to end violence against women and children

Abuse is confusing.
It’s not constant — it shifts.

Abusive people are not abusive all the time.
That’s what makes it so complicated.

When they’re not being cruel, you share real things.
You laugh together.
You share memories.
You find common ground.
You feel like maybe — just maybe — this time will be different.

And all of that?
It’s real.

The good moments don’t erase the abuse,
but the abuse doesn’t erase the good moments either.
That’s the trap — the magnet that pulls you back in.

You keep remembering what it could be,
because part of it was.
And that makes leaving feel like tearing yourself away from something precious. 

Hope.

But here’s the truth:
you didn’t mess it up.
They did.

They chose to abuse.
They chose to lie, control, harm, or betray the trust you gave freely.
They broke what could have been good.

You were trying to love someone who made that impossible.

And leaving?
That wasn’t weakness.
That was courage —
the kind that grows out of heartbreak, wisdom, and survival.

Affirmation:

I did not fail by loving.
They failed by abusing.
I am not broken — I am breaking free.