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Respect Is Supposed to Be Mutual—But Women Know Better

Respect is supposed to be mutual.But you wouldn’t know that if you listened to today’s men speak. Somehow, women are expected to earn it, perform for

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Respect is supposed to be mutual.
But you wouldn’t know that if you listened to today’s men speak.

Somehow, women are expected to earn it, perform for it, suffer in silence for it, prove why we deserve it.
Meanwhile, men just… exist—and claim they’re owed our trust, our space, our submission, and our silence.

And the moment a woman says,

“I need safety.”
“I need boundaries.”
“I need healing.”
the response is:

“Not all men.”
“What about men’s mental health?”
“You sound bitter.”

But let’s tell the whole truth.

Males commit the vast majority of violence against women.

  • Over 83% of women in the U.S. have experienced sexual harassment, assault, or both—and most perpetrators were male.
    (Source: National Sexual Violence Resource Center)

Men are not taking the lead on solving this.
Men are not organizing to protect women from each other.
Men are not shutting it down when their brothers, cousins, other kin folks, best friends, leaders, favorite artists, favorite performers, favorite online famous people, and pastors choose to become predators.

Because they are not choosing to be the solution. They are choosing to continue to be the problem.

No matter how they dress it up.
No matter how gentle, progressive, liberal, conservative, faith-filled, or “changed” they say they are.

Until men dismantle the violence among themselves, they do not get to lecture us about tone, timing, or sisterhood.


💡 How Respect for Women Must Be Shown by Men—Not Just Said

We don’t want apologies.
We don’t want hashtags.
We don’t want your empty allyship.

We want evidence.

✊🏾 Respect means:

  • Respect for Our Spaces
    We do not have to prove why we need women-only spaces. You know why. Respect the boundary.

  • Respect for Our Leadership
    Stop talking over us. Stop sidelining us. Stop borrowing from us without credit. Support women-led initiatives fully.

  • Respect for Our Voices
    Don’t wait until tragedy to quote us. Don’t cherry-pick what sounds good. Listen when we speak truth—even when it stings.

  • Respect for Our Questions
    We are allowed to question power, systems, laws, and traditions that harm us. Respect our critical thinking.

  • Respect for Our Concerns
    When a woman says, “I feel unsafe,” believe her. Before the violence. Before the stalking. Before the murder.

  • Respect for Our Choices
    Whether we stay, leave, mother, don’t mother, lead, worship, or walk away—our lives are ours.

  • Respect for Our Bodies
    No entitlement. No commentary. No invasion. Full bodily autonomy.

  • Respect for Our Safety
    This is not negotiable. If you do not protect women’s safety, you do not respect women. Period.

  • Respect for Our Health
    Fight for healthcare. Fight for maternal justice. Fight for mental health care that centers trauma and reality.

  • Respect for Our Contributions
    Give credit. Pay us. Invite us into the room and let us keep our name on what we built.


📣 We’re Not Asking Anymore

We are not debating our humanity.
We are not defending our need for protection.
We are not performing respectability to be seen as worthy.

We are calling things by their name.

You told us to “earn respect.”
We’ve already done that.
Now it’s your turn.


Share if you feel safe and ready—your voice might be the lifeline someone else needs.
And if you do share, remember to cite the messenger.
Words carry legacy.

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