“Why are you still single?”“You need to lower your standards.”“You're too picky.”“You’re too old/fat/educated to be asking for that.” We hear it over
“Why are you still single?”
“You need to lower your standards.”
“You’re too picky.”
“You’re too old/fat/educated to be asking for that.”
We hear it over and over again.
But let’s call it what it is: Dating Preference Policing.
It’s the tired, controlling attempt to shame women out of their own desires, dreams, and discernment.
As if a woman’s joy is negotiable. As if her preferences are a problem.
As if her peace must come second to someone else’s ego.
Let’s be very clear:
You will not educate a woman out of her preferences.
She doesn’t need to be corrected.
She likes what she likes. And she’s allowed to.
She knows herself. Deeply. And that self-knowing is sacred.
She has already tried living life on someone else’s terms.
She’s worn the costume. Smiled through the strain.
And it didn’t fit.
It bruised her spirit.
It dulled her light.
It made her feel invisible in a life that was supposed to be hers.
Now? She refuses.
Refuses to be a prop in someone else’s narrative.
Refuses to edit herself into a version that makes others more comfortable.
Refuses to shrink for access to temporary company.
Because her happiness matters.
Not as a footnote.
Not as an afterthought.
Not as a reward for being agreeable.
But as the foundation.
🌀 Survivor Affirmation Snippet
“She tried on the life they told her would keep her safe.
She smiled, folded, stayed small.
But peace never came.
So she rose—
and now she walks in truth tailored to her joy.”
đź’¬ Call to Action
To the women who are reclaiming their voice, their choices, and their standards—
we see you. We honor you. We learn from you.
Don’t back down. Don’t water it down. Don’t explain it away.
This is your life. Let it fit you beautifully.
